to see or not to see?

That was the question. The answer is... TO SEE! I did have the surgery Wednesday. It went well. My eyes are still swollen, and both eyes are "bruised"(great big red spot on the white part of my eye) from the suction thing they put on my eye to make the cut. The L is worse than the R. My vision is not 100% equal in both eyes yet, meaning that one eye is seeing a little better than the other, but that is supposed to get better as the swelling goes down. I can see great. It is really weird. I am driving during the day. I keep thinking at night that I need to go take out my contacts. It is really strange to go to bed able to see! I have to wear goggles taped to my face at night for the first 7 days and no eye makeup for the first 7 days. Overall, things are going really well. I am very sensitive to light right now so I cannot spend much time on the computer, so that's all for now. I will post more later, maybe even a picture! Thanks for your prayers.

surgery?

Maybe. Maybe not. Yesterday I went for my pre-op testing for my surgery which is scheduled for tomorrow. In the past 3 weeks I have had 2 plugs placed into my L eye lower tear duct, which have both come out. My eye seems to be rejecting them. These plugs are to help with my dry eyes. So yesterday they told me that my L eye looks too dry for them to be able to do surgery this week, UNLESS I go and have another plug put in right away. So I did. My 3rd plug inserted in 3 weeks (and it hurts!). But to get to the point, I may or may not have surgery tomorrow. The plan is that I will come in as scheduled, then meet with the surgeon. He will then determine if it is safe to proceed. So, we will see. I have been really nervous about the surgery so I have been reading the story about when Jesus healed the blind man (which is comforting to me). There is a lot to be taken from that. One thing is that the account in John (chapter 9) says that when they saw the blind man, the disciples asked Jesus, 'who has sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?' (as if for this type of thing to happen it must have been a punishment because of some type of sin, and I think there are so many people that believe that - that God will punish you with something horrible related to past sins, and how sad because that is such a heavy load of guilt to carry upon yourself.) But in the story, Jesus says "Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life... ". I really wish that I could have come upon those verses when we lost our first baby. We were searching so hard to find an answer and to try to understand why God would let this happen and could not accept the theory that it happened because of past sins because we knew God is a loving God and would not do that. We had to believe that it was just the course of nature and since it had happened God would use it for some purpose, and looking back he did. I have been able to help several friends through losses of their own just by being there and knowing what they were experiencing. It also screams out to be applied to the situation of when Dad had his cardiac arrest in Dec 2001. There was no explanation for how he lived through that much less how he lived through it without brain injury. Many peoples lived have been touched from hearing his story and all the credit for his recovery was given to God. You could definitely say that "this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life....".
--- Another angle from this passage and also including the passage of the same story in Mark, is the whole thing of the actual healing that Jesus performed. It's funny because I ran across this article a couple of years ago on the internet and printed it out and have kept it in my Bible ever since because I was so touched and intrigued by it. It's an article entitled 'Miraculous Restoration of Sight' by Bill Sardi. http://www.lewrockwell.com/sardi/sardi41.html If you have a minute go read it, it's not very long. It compares the healing Jesus did to the modern technology of today, where the cornea is reshaped with a laser to correct vision. (LASIK). I get emotional when I think of it. Although I am not blind and am in no way trying to compare myself to the man in the story, my vision is very bad and greatly affects my quality of life. I cannot even see my own face in the mirror without my glasses. I got glasses when I was 7 years old (which is a whole story in itself) so I cannot even remember seeing clearly. I have no idea what that will be like. In one way I cannot wait for the surgery (possible surgery), but I still have that nervousness, too. I will update after tomorrow what happens with everything.

future leader?

Last Saturday, the 6th, we were finishing up dinner when we realized Samuel had not yet done his chores. We mentioned to him that he needed to remember to get his chores done before going to bed. He said "okay" and went back outside to play. A few minutes later Josh and I are still sitting at the table just talking and we hear all this commotion. Samuel comes into our kitchen followed by 4 of the neighbor kids. We asked him "what's going on?" He said "They're here to help me do my chores....". He then proceded to instruct them on each of his chores while they did them for him. We didn't really know what to say. After all, we hadn't discussed the possibility of delegation when we assigned him his chores. Luckily I had my camera handy. In the photo, you can see Samuel showing his friends where to put the dog food.

last week

It seems we have been so busy I didn't get a chance to update what was happening with us. I'll just give a couple of highlights since we are well into another week.

I would say the low point of last week was on Wednesday the 3rd..... We were at church for the weekly Wed night dinner followed by the Awana program, which Josh and I help out with the Cubbies while Samuel attends Sparks and Nora Kate goes to the nursery. Anyway, they were serving spaghetti on those styrofoam plates that have that really slippery coating... (you see where this is going don't you......) Well, apparently I tipped my plate just ever so slightly and my entire plate of spaghetti poured out on to Nora Kate's head. It was not good. She was not happy. Thankfully she was not burned. I had to rush her to the bathroom and lay her on the counter while I tried to wash the sauce out of her hair. I got most of it out there, and washed the remaining chunks out when we got home. Not that this was important, but I was pretty covered in it too, and sadly it went all over my newish running shoes that used to be so nice and clean looking....

Now on to the high point... I would say the high point of the week was Friday the 5th, my 36th birthday. Josh did not disappoint! I got an ipod! He got me the 4GB ipad nano with the arm band (I guess I'm supposed to use that when I exercise, which means I guess I am supposed to exercise), and he got these really cool new age looking speakers for us to play it on. I feel so supercool now. We spent a lot of the weekend downloading songs (he was dying that I downloaded 16 Indigo Girls songs "this sucks....") but it is my ipod, right? He also got my name engraved on my Bible and got me a gift certificate to my favorite store, Ann Taylor Loft. Samuel (and Nora Kate) also picked out a necklace for me, very pretty. I am usually not so lavished with such gifts on my birthday, but it was a "moving year". Last "moving year" when we moved to PA in 04 I got a necklace from Tiffany's. I guess moving has it's perks. No, really the speakers for the ipod was kind of like a family gift since we will all use it and enjoy it, and Josh and I have always wanted a stereo system and have never had one, so this is kind of filling that hole for us. Anyway, I'm posting a couple of pictures from my birthday. One is a rare sighting of me in my glasses with the kids, and the other is of the kids literally digging in to the cake. Hope you enjoy.

visits from heaven

This morning while I was driving Samuel to school he said to me...

"Mommy, when I get to heaven, I am going to come down and visit you guys every morning. And I'm going to visit Henry too (Henry is his stuffed dog which used to be Josh's stuffed dog when he was a kid), or maybe I'll just take Henry with me. Does God let you come visit people when you're in heaven?" (Some days the questions are easier than others. A couple minutes before that question he had asked me why cars have windows. I was feeling pretty good with that one until he entered into the heavier subject....)

Earlier this week, as they were walking up to the playroom, he told his friend from next door that he only lets kids play with him that trust in Jesus.

I just thought it was so sweet.